The Joy In Every Season Podcast

 Hey, guys. Today’s episode is all about minimalism and how minimalism can help you make room for more joy in your life.  I’m recording this little intro after the episode has already been recorded. Just to let you know, I didn’t have a lot of notes for this, but it’s something I know a lot about.

It’s a topic I’m trying to write a book about something that I really enjoy. And so I get a little ranty and rambly as well. But I really hope you guys enjoy this episode, and tune in next time for another episode. Enjoy.

All right. Welcome to episode four of Joy in Every Season. I’m so excited to talk to you guys today. I was actually planning on doing a different episode, but my plan fell through, so I’m flying a little bit by the seat of my pants with a no-notes episode. I have a sort of idea of what I wanna talk about.

Mostly because I picked a topic that I know a lot about. By the title, you guys can see that I will be talking about minimalism. Why minimalism? Let’s get into it, and I’ll tell you why.

When I was a kid, I was a collector. I collected. All sorts of things. I just, there was something about having one of everything or a bunch of one thing. It was just so cool to me. So I had lots of different collections of things, and I grew sentimental attachments to most of my things, clothes, books. I was basically a child hoarder. You could not see my floor because I was also a mess. I was a huge mess.

I did not pick up after myself, so you could not see my floor because of all of the stuff that I had. This continued until like high school-ish until, actually more like middle school, till I started like actually wanting my room to look nice and pick up after myself. But I still held onto like my collecting habits of collecting things.

I had a lot of books and had a rock collection and a shell collection and some of those things I still have some of, but I’ve let go of certain things. You might be wondering, what changed? ’cause I was a long period of time that I just collected things and I went thrifting and shopping was also a little bit of a shopaholic in high school and college. And once I got my own job and my first taste of my own money that I could do whatever I want with. I went a little crazy, and I brought way more into my house than I was letting go of.

So when I moved out of my dad’s house into my college dorm room, I didn’t take everything with me, obviously, most people moving to college leave a lot of their stuff in their like childhood bedroom, which is what I did. I took my bed. Nope. They provided beds for us. Nevermind. So I took what a college kid needs, like dishes and blankets and clothes and my textbooks and like little knickknacks that I thought might look cool. Some books that I would read, but I mostly kept it pretty chill because I knew that I’d be sharing a little apartment with three other people and I didn’t want to leave the whole house a mess.

So in college, it made me realize how much nicer it was to live with not so much crap laying around my room and everywhere and it was easier to take care of my stuff. It was easier to keep it clean, and it was really great. So then year two of college, yeah, year two, I got married halfway through the year. Yeah. So then I moved out of my dorm room, brought all of my college stuff into my new apartment with my husband, and he brought all of his stuff from his dorm room. And then, because we did what you’re supposed to do we took all of our stuff from our childhood bedrooms also and brought it into our house. And I had so much stuff. Most of the stuff that we brought into the house, into the apartment, was mine. It was boxes and boxes of just my stuff.

I had notebooks and like art projects from elementary school and just clothes from middle school that I like still had for some reason, shoes, books. Just all of the little things that I had collected over the years was now in my apartment that I shared with my new husband and all of his stuff. He did not have a lot of stuff because he’s a simple guy with simple likes.He just, he would be happy with a bed and his desk with his computer stuff and food, of course. So yeah, it was mostly my stuff. Stil,l most of the stuff in our house is my stuff. But I started to realize that I did not want this much stuff.

And in 2019, 2020 is around when sparking Joy with Marie Kondo came out on Netflix and this was a completely new concept to me. Like I’d watched Hoarders, and I was like, at least I’m not there. And that always inspired me to get rid of a couple things, but after watching Marie Con- “Tidying Up with Marie Kondo,” that’s what it’s called. After watching that, I, it was a completely new concept to me of minimalism and like having less stuff. But I knew that I didn’t want to only have 30 outfits, I didn’t only wanna have 30 books in my house. because I am a huge reader and I love books and I want my kids one day to also love books, so I want them to have lots of options and go to the library and all this kind of thing.

I knew that Marie Kondo’s type of minimalism was not what I wanted. And the more I looked into it, the more like stereotypical pictures came up of blank houses with like very sparse furniture, white walls, no knickknacks, nothing. And that is just, that’s not me. I really like color, and I like to have my little knickknacks and a lot of my stuff does spark joy, but I started looking more into it. Because when I find a topic I’m interested in, I kind of just do a deep dive, and I found. what’s the guy’s name?

I found the book, “The More Of Less” by Joshua Becker. And he also has a blog and a podcast, and I started listening to his podcast and he talked about how one day he was cleaning out his garage, his storage stuff. There was so much stuff that they really couldn’t even fit their car in. 

And his son was outside playing, asking, “Dad can play with me. I wanna play.”

And he (Joshua) was like “I just, I really have to get this done. I really need to organize this and clear it out.” And he was bringing stuff to the dumpster, and he ran into his neighbor and was just talking about how much stuff there is to manage. And his neighbor talked about how their relative was getting into minimalism and he was just like, what is that? So he talked to his wife and they started the process of decluttering and now he’s. All about minimalism and  having less stuff and making room for the things that matter to you.

And I was like, I really like how this guy talks about it, because it’s not about only having a certain number of things and having a really tidy space and all of this stuff that’s just like really unattainable for a lot of people, especially like people with kids or people that like their house not to look like a hospital.

Sorry, if you like your house like that. It’s just, it’s not my jam. I knew that I wanted to get rid of things, and I also I also had a relative that like basically was a hoarder and I knew I didn’t wanna be like that. It runs in my family to just hold onto everything. There were rooms in their house that were just like full of stuff  they were in usable rooms. They were supposed to be usable rooms, but they weren’t. And I just, I knew that I didn’t want that, but I knew I didn’t want the other extreme. Of not having anything in my house.

So I was like, there’s gotta be some sort of middle ground. So I started looking into it more, listening to podcasts, reading books and came across a podcast called Minimal Ish. And it’s this mom, and she’s talking about how she also really liked minimalism and decluttering and what it was doing for her family and her home and her mental health and all of this she knew that. Marie Kondo’s style wasn’t for everybody. So she was like, I’m just minimal ish. I’m not a minimalist. I’m a minimal-ish person, basically making minimalism work for you. It doesn’t, it’s not a cookie cutter thing. It doesn’t have to be like. What it’s a stereotype or what it looks like for other people.

The more that I looked into it, I was like, okay, I’m gonna go through and declutter things. So a lot of my stuff was still in boxes, and it had been like, six months of living with my new husband in our little apartment, which really did not have the room. For all of this stuff.

It was a one-bedroom, tiny loft apartment with a little living room, a little kitchen, and this tiny bedroom upstairs. There was no room for all of my stuff. There was like this little closet where there was to be a washer and dryer that there weren’t washer and dryer hookups. They took them out for some reason, and that was where I shoved all of my boxes.

That is where my boxes lived. So I started going through my boxes one by one, figuring out do I wanna keep this? Is this valuable to me? Is this going to bring me closer to the life I wanna live? I started asking myself all of these different questions. It was still really hard decluttering, especially if you have a lot of stuff and you’re emotionally attached to things. ‘Cause things hold memories for me, but I’ve gotten a lot better about it. But especially if it’s like a gift or something I spend a lot of time on, it’s really, or money, it’s really hard for me to let go of it. So I was having a really hard time figuring out how to make it work for me and how to just let go of all of the stuff.

I found more resources and looked into different ways of thinking about it, of simplifying your life and Joshua Becker puts it like when you are decluttering, you are simplifying your life to make room for the things that you actually want to do. Because if you have less stuff, you spend less time maintaining it, which means that you have more time in your day, in your week, in your month, in your year, to go and do other things that you actually want to do.

If I’m, spending way less time on laundry because I don’t have as many clothes as I used to, I can spend that time that I would’ve been spending on that reading. Or writing or doing something that I really enjoy, spending time with my husband, playing a game, all of those types of things.

And for Joshua Becker, it was, “if I’m spending less time maintaining my things, spending less time cleaning my things. I can spend that time with my wife and with my son,” and eventually, now he has more kids. And so now he gets to spend that time playing with his kids and being a dad. And that was really what did it for me. So I started trying to figure out different questions I could ask to really like, help myself part with things. I made a list of it, and let me find it real quick.

  

So, I’ll read that list in a second, but I will tell you how I started. I broke it into steps. I broke it into four steps. Step one: get rid of stuff. Step two: organize what’s left. Step three: keep it organized. And step four: buy less stuff. I also broke it into zones. And by zones, I mean going room by room and in each room, if it’s super overwhelming for you, you can do kind of what Marie Kondo does and break it into smaller pieces, clothes, and doing it by category or just like one part of your room, and you can declutter that area.

You can get rid of things. But you can also find homes for things that don’t belong there or put things back, tidy it up, organize it, make it look how you want it. And then, um, I think my favorite method of decluttering is the box method, which, basically, you get boxes or I kind of just do piles, of keep, sell, donate. Or trash, and sometimes recycle if it’s applicable. I also sometimes do, an area of gift to friends. If it’s something that I want to get rid of, that I know one of my friends will love, I can put it into a pile and give it to them ‘ cause they’ll like it and they’ll use it. There’s a lot of different, types of decluttering. So there’s Marie Kondo, the KonMari Method. You touch each item, see if it sparks joy for you, and if it doesn’t, you thank it and move on. Then there’s Joshua Becker. You start small. You decide what this space is for you, go through your belongings. start with yourself if you’re married or you have kids.

Start with your own things. Don’t like, get rid of your spouse’s stuff or your kid’s stuff because it will come back to bite you. I tried that once, and I got rid of some of my husband’s like clothes, and then he was like looking for them and I was like, “Uh, I donated those.” And he was like, “Oh, I like that shirt. I was like, I did not, and it’s gone now.” I do not recommend that. Don’t get rid of your husband’s things without asking. I learned that the hard way.

Joshua Becker recommends that you don’t sell, that you donate instead, because with a yard sale, all your decluttered items will just sit in the corner waiting to be sold, which is very true. The only reason I would like to have, I like selling on Facebook marketplace, but I do wanna have a yard sale soon just because, my husband and I are saving money for stuff right now. yeah. And then asking hard questions. analyzing your attachments to items. What  are you wanting? Why are you not wanting to get rid of something? And is it actually adding to your life?

And then there’s the room-by-room method, which I talked  about. Then there’s the “one item method.” It’s, uh, all about getting rid of one thing a day for a set period of time. It’s usually used as a challenge to get you started. And usually what happens with the one-item method is that you get started and you find one thing and then you find a bunch of other things. If you’re doing it for like 30 days, you don’t wanna find one thing and then be like, oh, well I also wanna get rid of all these things. And then count that for your 30 days. That’s not how it works. You have to do it once a day.

The packing party. It is the best if you are moving. Otherwise, it doesn’t make sense. You gather all your things to pack, and you ask yourself, is this something I want to take with me or want? Do I want to pack it up, bring it to a new place, unpack it, and find a new place for it in my new space? And if that answer is no, get rid of it.

There’s one specifically for clothing, called “the hangar method.” You turn all of your hangers around in your closet after you’ve finished your laundry, and then you set a time period, say like six months, but also keeping seasons in mind. If by the end of those six months there are clothes that are still with the hangers turned around. It means you haven’t worn them. Because when you wear them and you clean them and you put them back, you put them back the right way.

And so at the end of that month or six months or whatever, there’s hangers that are turned around, and you know that those aren’t things that you wear, those aren’t things you reach for. And you can go ahead and get rid of them unless they’re like a seasonal item. Like the reason you’re not wearing it is because it’s summer and it’s a sweater and you don’t wear sweaters in summer or shorts in winter. Or it’s like a Christmas-y item and you don’t wear Christmas items on the 4th of July. Well, I mean, maybe you do. I’m not gonna judge. I would do that. I have these really cool Christmas leggings that are really comfortable, but I don’t, wouldn’t wear them on, I actually wouldn’t wear those on the 4th of July ‘ cause they’re too hot.

But anyway, then there’s the jail box method, 15 15-minute tidy up and you put the items in jail. And you go through them later. So anything that’s not supposed to be in that area, or maybe it is, you just put it in a box, and you go through it later. It’s not my favorite because I forget about it. And if you heard that, that was a firework; it is almost the 4th of July, even though it’s only June 27th. My neighbors always like to set off their fireworks early. Anyway, I always forget about the box doing the jail box method, and then I either lose the items inside that I actually wanted, which is a good like indicator of, oh, I do actually use this, but sometimes I don’t remember where I put that box and I end up buying a double of the thing that I lost. So it’s not, it’s not my favorite. It usually ends up adding more clutter to my house, but it could work for you.

And then my favorite method is my very own. I just mash all of those together and make it work for myself.  

Now I will give you the list of what I ask myself.

Do I like it? Do I want to keep it? Do I use it? Would someone else get more use out of this? Is it broken? And if so, can it be fixed, recycled, or upcycled? Can I repurpose it? Could I sell it? Will I use this if I’m not using it now? Is it trash? If it’s trash, just throw it out. Can this be donated? Would one of my friends like this better?

Does this fit me specifically for clothes and shoes? I just went through some of my shoes, and I have this really cute pair of heels, but they’re half a size too big, and so I can’t actually walk in them, and I’ve never worn them because I can’t walk in them, and so I’m selling them. I’m getting rid of them. It’s fine. I’m a little sad about it, but I can find another pair of heels that I like and will wear, because I am looking for heels that are in my size.

But anyway, um, the next question is, will this item contribute to my goals? Does this add value to my life? If I died, would a loved one want this if I died? Would my loved ones want to have to sort through this? Is this expired, that’s going through like medicine, cabinet pantry, et cetera? Are there missing pieces or missing items that go with this? And if you can’t find those pieces, is it usable? Do you want to keep it?

And then there’s the funniest rule or question, the poop rule. If this item had poop on it, would I clean it or would I throw it away? And if the answer is ‘no,’ then throw it away. Get rid of it. Obviously, you don’t have to actually put poop on it. Please don’t put poop on your things to, to answer that question. Just do it hypothetically. I feel like I have to add that. You probably won’t do it, but you know what I mean.

And then there is this other method called the Swedish Death Cleaning Method. Well, it’s actually just Swedish death cleaning. In Sweden, when people get to a certain age, they start going through their things themselves and they start minimizing the stuff in their home. It’s kind of morbid, but. It makes so much sense once you think about it. The idea behind it is that people die when they get older, and the question people ask themselves is, will my loved ones want this or need this when I die? And is this something that my loved ones will want to sort through when I’m gone?

There’s now like books about it, TV shows about it. It’s so practical, such a helpful tool when you’re decluttering, but it makes so much sense. It’s technically a method for older people, but like life is short. You could die tomorrow, and you don’t know. So, it’s just a good idea to think about it. Don’t think about it too hard, or you might get too sad. When I get stuck on something and I know that I’m probably not gonna use it, but for some reason I can’t get rid of it, I ask myself the questions of, if I died tomorrow, would someone I love want to use this or take it? Or would it just be another thing that they would have to sort through and get rid of? Very morbid to think about. I’m so sorry, but valuable question to ask.

And I’m sure you guys are probably wondering why I’m talking about this, From the title, you know, that minimalism can make room for joy. because when you get rid of the things that you don’t want, that you don’t use, and keep the things that you do want, and that you do us,e and spark joy, like Marie Kondo says,

There’s so much less that you have to deal with and so much more time in your day. And once you go through the process of like decluttering your house, it also kind of changes how you think about spending money on physical items. It definitely did for me because some of the stuff that I was decluttering was stuff that I had just bought, and I was like, “Why did I buy this?” Because it was an impulse buy, a spontaneous purchase. I didn’t really need it, but I thought it looked, maybe, looked cute. But then, when I got home and I actually looked at it and thought about using it, I was like, I don’t actually like this. So, going into stores now, I’m a lot more conscious of the decisions I’m making Do I actually want to bring this item into my house? Is it just gonna add clutter? Am I going to use it? Is it something that I need?

I spend a lot less money on stuff, do a lot less online shopping because online shopping brings packaging and all of that, that you have to figure out how to dispose of. Sometimes online shopping is impulse buys because it’s really easy to just click that button and it gets sent  to you and sometimes you forget about it and it gets to your door and you’re like, I forgot I got this. Why did I get this? So, yeah, it’s helped me be frugal, which also frees up my budget to be able to spend money on the things that I actually want to spend money on, things that I am saving money for. Things like tattoos or trips or things that have been on my Christmas list for a long time. It leaves room in the budget for like emergencies. It gives you more. Money to just be able to save.

Minimalism for me is more about simplifying your life so that there’s more time and energy and room for the things that you really enjoy. For me, I spend a lot less money. I spend a lot less time managing the things. I like to try and declutter at least once a year. Sometimes more if I realize I’m getting back into old habits of spending too much money. ‘Cause I really love thrifting and I really love a good deal.

So sometimes I’ll go to the thrift store and. Shop and I’ve noticed that I use shopping as a coping mechanism. ‘Cause there’s just that little bit of dopamine when you get that cute thing in the thrift store that you really like. And most of those items like I do enjoy, but some of it I just, I have too much, especially clothes. I have a problem with buying too many clothes. And too many craft supplies. This year, I’ve been trying really hard to not buy extra craft supplies because I already have so many. But yeah. Let’s see. Where am I in my notes?

Minimalism also helps you to prioritize what really matters to you in your life; helps you know yourself better, make room for good things, and it helps you prioritize your time better. Yeah, it’s also just a good idea to just go through your things every once in a while.

In America and other Western societies, we have a very real society of consumerism. We just buy and buy and buy a lot of stuff that we do not need when we could be using that money for other things. In college, before I got married, I probably spent like $8,000 on stuff that I just did not need, which is a crazy number to think about.

If I hadn’t spent that much money on things I didn’t need that a lot of it I eventually got rid of because I didn’t need it. And I didn’t want it. And it was just impulse buying. Partially, it was because I was really stressed at the time, and shopping is a coping mechanism for me sometimes. If I hadn’t spent that much money on things that I didn’t need, that I eventually got rid of, I could have saved that money for going on a better honeymoon.

Obviously, I loved my honeymoon. It was very fun. We stayed in a cabin and we watched a bunch of movies. It was amazing, but if we had been able to go to like Italy or Hawaii or something like that, would I have loved to do that? Of course, of course. I love traveling, which is part of my point. If I am spending less on things that I don’t need, that I will eventually declutter when I go through my house, I can use that money on things that I actually want.

And a lot of that stuff is experiences. I really enjoy going and doing things like being able to go out to eat and not feel guilty about spending that money because it’s not the food that’s fun. Obviously, I like a good meal. I like some good pasta and desserts, but it’s the person that I’m going with. Either it’s a date night, or it’s with friends, or it’s a dinner with my dad and my husband or his parents. It’s the memories that I enjoy, and if I have more time in my day, more money to spend because I’m not spending it on dumb things and more room in my house for the things that I do, like I can do the things that I enjoy doing. I can make more art and read more books. I can go to the library, I can go to the lake. I can go and do all of the things that I really like doing, and I can spend money on the things that I wouldn’t be able to spend money on if I was spending it on other things.

So my point is, when your life is more simple. It makes room for so much more joy. For me, specifically, it makes room for spending time with my friends, like getting a coffee and not feeling bad about spending $5 on a latte, or my husband and I going on a vacation, or being able to have money in savings. If I hadn’t spent so much money in my first year of college, we would’ve been able to have so much more money in savings, and COVID probably wouldn’t have hit us so hard because  it was like November, December? It was like five months after we got married that COVID hit.

So our first year of marriage was just us in our little apartment, and we lost our jobs because nobody was working if it wasn’t essential. And so we weren’t able to pay our rent. So, we moved in with my dad. Luckily I had brought a lot less stuff that time because I’d done the work of decluttering. So, it was a lot less expensive to move all of that back because there was less of it. There was less space to be taken up by it.

But yeah, if I hadn’t spent so much money, we probably would’ve been able to move out of my dad’s faster. But obviously you can’t, you can’t beat yourself up about stuff like that. Like, if I could have gone back and told my younger self, “Don’t spend so much money on stupid things”, would I do that? Yes, I would. And I would say, “Save that money instead so that you can do fun things later.” Because I’m an extrovert and I like going and doing things, and the less time I have to spend at home doing the dishes and doing laundry and cleaning up my stuff, the more time that I can go out and do things and spend time with my friends and my husband and my family doing things that I enjoy, making memories. And it’s so much more joyful to me to do that than to have to manage all of my stuff, you know?

I love to talk about this, as you can probably tell. If you give me a topic that I know a lot about, I’ve done so much research on this, you guys, I’ve listened to so many podcasts. I’ve read like four or five books on it, and so many articles, Instagram posts, TikTok and YouTube videos and Instagram reels, and like all the things. And then, of course, the show.

I also watched a lot of Hoarders because sometimes when I would get stuck in my decluttering and have no motivation, because sometimes it gets so overwhelming, I would watch an episode of Hoarders, and it would get me going so fast. You have no idea. So if you ever get stuck when you’re decluttering, watch an episode of Hoarders and it’ll help you.

Anyways. Yeah, so I hope this helped you guys. I’m gonna wind down here. I hope this gave you some motivation, maybe to do a little bit of decluttering yourself. You do not have to become a minimalist. I don’t fully qualify myself as a minimalist. I’m minimal-ish because I’m still working on the “bringing in less stuff to my house.”

My main things that I struggle with are craft supplies. Books and clothes. I love books. I love having craft supplies to be able to do things with and clothes because clothes are fun, but I’m trying my best not to bring in too much that I’m not actually gonna use because I would love to spend less time doing laundry.

I hate laundry. I hate laundry so much. Anyways, I hope this helped you guys and. inspired you or, mainly inspired you to find areas in your life that you can simplify, that you can cut something down, say no, to give yourself more room, more time, more budget to be able to do the things you wanna do, make the memories you wanna make, and have the things in your house. That you actually want to have in your house, and not just a bunch of junk.  

I am so glad that you guys listened to this episode if you got all the way here. I will see you guys next time that I record, in a couple weeks and thank you so much for listening. Bye!

Before I let you guys go, I wanna talk about today’s sponsor. It’s me, I’m the sponsor. Surprise. It’s not really that much of a surprise. Today’s sponsor is Castle Books, which is my online used bookstore, and it is what pays for this podcast to be on the air in all of the places that it is. And if you guys want to check out the books that I have on my website and any other merchandise that I have, the link is in the description and will be in the show notes on our WordPress, that has all the show notes.

Also, if you didn’t know. I have show notes and a transcription of every episode on my website, which is a WordPress blog that I have everything on. And all of the links that you need are also on that blog page website. I hope you guys enjoyed today’s episode. It was a lot more casual. Definitely no notes. There were some notes. There were some notes, but they were from the book that I’m writing on minimalism. I definitely repeated myself a lot. Sorry about that. Anyways, have a great day. Remember to choose joy in every season of your life, even when it’s hard, and especially when it’s not hard. Goodbye! 

Note: I didn’t listen to Joshua Becker’s podcast. I listened to episodes of podcasts that he was on and I watched his YouTube. Oops. lol